by Dr. Sabrina D. Black

The Secrets to Making More than a Passing Grade
 
On the broadcast we discussed how to get an A with the people in your life by apply a few basic principles. No one wants to be in a relationship with some one who is just passing. Just like when you are in school, if you need extra credit assignments to help you improve your grade, you can do the same thing in your relationships. These tips are part of an extended message preached in ..:namespace prefix = st1 ns = “urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags” />Delaware at a men’s conference and are part of a soon to be released book by the same title.

The seven tips that were shared on the broadcast for “How to Get An A with the People in Your Life”  included:

1. ABIDE – Spend time with God becoming more like him. Enhancing your relationship with Christ will help you improve your intimacy with God and others. As you abide with others you spend time with them getting to know them better. The Bible admonishes us to dwell with others according to knowledge; which means to live with what you know.

1. ATTENTION – It is amazing the way people will act out to get your attention, to be noticed, to be a focal point in your life. Whether their behavior is positive or negative the desire for attention is so strong that people will do whatever is necessary to get it. Give the people in your life some of your undivided attention daily.

1. AFFECTION – The human touch is very important; it is soothing, comforting, nurturing and can be stimulating. Affection can simply be holding hands, hugging, kissing and even sexual intimacy (reserved only for those who are married with their spouse). One thing does not always lead to the other. Affection especially sex is better when people learn to abide and pay attention to one another first. Be sure to demonstrate Godly love and affection to your children so that they don’t look for it somewhere else.

1. APPRECIATION – Show simple courtesy in your relationships by saying “thank you” and “please.” Let people know that you value them and you are glad that they are in your life. Send notes, cards and little gifts via email or postal mail to let others know that you care. It’s nice to know that people have taken notice of you and the things you do that can often be taken for granted.

1. ACCOUNTABILITY – God has placed us in relationships so that we can experience unity and oneness. When we are accountable to others they can help us maintain the standard of holiness and righteousness that we commit to as Christians. Accountability requires intentional openness and honesty. Time out for lone rangers, rebels and renegades; we all need accountability.

1. APOLOGIZE – Take time to apologize by saying you are sorry and asking for forgiveness. Take time to admit when you are wrong, when you have offended someone or over stepped your boundaries. The Bible reminds us that if we have ought against or brother or believe our brother has something against us we should go and be reconciled. Keep short accounts – apologize and repent from the attitude or action.

1. AUTHENTIC – Be who God has created you to be. You are uniquely formed and fashioned for your specific purpose and destiny. So be real in the relationship. Don’t pretend to be someone you are not by putting on airs. The same thing it takes to get a person will be what it takes to keep them. There is a natural flow and rhythm to life when you allow yourself to relax and be who you are without apology.

Above all demonstrate LOVE. The best way to get an “A” with the people in your life to share your heart and apply any of the Biblical principles or scriptures on how to relate one to another.

God (Acknowledge, Admit, Accept, Abide, Attach, Abound)

Yourself (Acceptance)

Others (Apply the Word)

Men (  )

Man to Man (Accountability, Athletics)

Woman to Man (Admiration, Affection, Assistance)

Women (  )

Woman to Woman (Affirmation, Affiliation,

Man to Woman (Attention, Articulation, Appreciation)

Parents (Appreciation,

Children (Authority)

Friends (Acceptance)

Pastor (Accountability)

Employer (Attendance, Allegiance, Availability)

Employee (Acknowledgement, Applause, Advancement)

How to Get an A:  Definitions

1. ABIDE                                   to tolerate; to remain; to last; to conform to. 
2. ABILITY                               state of being able; competence.
3. ABREAST                             side by side.
4. ABSTAIN                              refrain from doing something.
5. ABUNDANT                         ample supply; plenty.
6. ACCEPTANCE                   approval; being satisfied; taking that which is proper.
7. ACCESSION                                    the ability to store data.
8. ACCOMODATING             to adjust, change, or convenience; cooperative.
9. ACCOMPANY                     escort; go along with.
10. ACCORD                              harmony; conformity .
11. ACCOUNTABLE                responsible or liable.
12. ACHEIVEMENT                 performance; to succeed.
13. ACKNOWLEDGE               to recognize.
14. ACQUAINT                          to make familiar; fellowship.             
15. ACQUICSCENT                  agree without arguing; consent or comply.
16. ACQUIT                                rule not guilty; pardon; excuse.
17. ACTION                                deed; performance or play.
18. ADDRESS                             to speak or speak about something.
19. ADMIRATION                     regard with wonder; appreciate; esteem.
20. ADMISSION                         to give the right to enter or access.
21. ADMIT                                  confess or own up to .
22. ADORATION                       to love greatly; worship.
23. ADVISE                                 to give an opinion; recommend; warn.
24. ADVOCATE                         speak in favor of; defend; support.
25. AFFECTION                                    warm, loving, tender, fond, attached.
26. AFFILIATION                     to join or associate with common ownership.
27. AFFINITY                            natural attraction or liking, relationship by marriage.
28. AFFIRMATION                   to declare positively; confirm.
29. AGREEABLE                      the ability to give consent; cooperative.
30. AID                                         to give help; relieve, assist, support .
31. ALERT                                  watchful, vigilant; attentive.
32. ALLEGIANCE                     loyalty to one’s mate; devotion, faithful, fidelity.
33. ALLIANCE                          partnership, union, understanding; marriage.
34. ALLOW                                 grant, permit; to make a provision for.
35. ALLURE                               to entice; to attempt; fascinate, charm .
36. AMICABILITY                    friendly; gracious, generous.
37. AMUSING                             entertaining in a comical way.
38. ANSWERABLE                   a written or spoken reply, as to a question.
39. APOLOGIZE                        a statement expressing regret for an action or fault.
40. APPEAL                                to make a request; to ask another for vindication .
41. APPEAR                               to come into public view; turn up.
42. APPLAUSE                          to express public approval; clap, cheer, praise.
43. APPRECIATION                 to recognize the worth, quality, or significance.
44. APPROBATION                  a formal approval.
45. ARRANGE                           to prepare for something; organize, plan.
46. ARRIVE                                to reach or get to a destination; appear.
47. ARTICULATE                     able to express oneself, clearly, effectively, or readily.
48. ASK                                        to request; to seek information. 
49. ASSENT                                to agree on something; accept.
50. ASSISTANCE                      to give support, to aid, to give help.
51. ASSOCIATION                    to connect, or join together; mingle.
52. ASSURE                                to give the feeling of confidence; promise, guarantee.          
53. ASTUTE                                sharp in discernment.
54. ATMOSPHERE                   predominant mood or feeling.
55. ATONE                                  to give satisfaction; to make amends.
56. ATTENTIVE                                    considerate, or mindful.
57. ATTRACTION                    to cause to draw near by appealing qualities.            
58. ATTRIBUTION                   to give, or to credit.                           
59. AVAILABLE                                    ready or present for immediate use.                           
60. AWARENESS                      perceptive, or conscious.

Original Broadcast “It’s Relational” (November 28, 2007)

Filed under: Relationships