by Kathleen Cvitkovic

Does it just seem like maternity leave flies by or is it me? When I had my daughter, I was working in the States, where you are very lucky if you get 16 weeks off (some new mom’s only get 12 weeks or less!). My time staying at home with my little princess was quickly closing in on me! When you have a c-section, you really only begin to feel back to normal around the 8 week mark. So once I began to feel better, I began counting the weeks, then the days and realized that I was going back very soon.

I secured a spot in a daycare for her and had given into the fact that I was going back to work. THEN my husband throws me of course by saying that I didn’t have to go back if I didn’t want to. We could make it work if I wanted to stay home for a while. WHAT! That was when I began battling a whole new dilemma….

To work or not to work…

How do you make that choice? Why is it always so hard to decide? Why can’t I do both? Seems like moms are always facing new challenges and decisions that impact the entire family. For me it was a tough choice but I eventually decided that it was better if I went back to work. It was a hard decision but I felt it was the best for our situation. I felt very fortunate that I was even able to consider staying at home. My husband and I knew that we might want a second baby (sooner then later!) so we talked it over and we made the decision.

For me, taking my daughter to the daycare the week before I went back to work to see how she adjusted was very important. Lucky for me, my friend’s sister owned the daycare! I felt very fortunate to have people that I felt comfortable with and she seemed to love all her new little friends. I don’t think she cried once!

I, on the other hand was a totally different story! My first day back I was all geared up and ready to go back to work. I dropped my daughter off at daycare and headed across the bridge to work. I was totally fine! I couldn’t believe it! I was really proud of myself for not crying when I dropped her off or while driving.

That was, until my darling husband called me on my cell phone to see how she did and how I was doing. I LOST IT! Although it was a sweet gesture for him to call to check on everything, as soon as I heard his voice the tears began to flow down my face. (Maybe flow down my face wasn’t really how it happened. It was more like a downpour or a thunderstorm occurring on my face.) Knowing me so well, my husband said that he would talk to me later and let me drive safely to work. As I pulled into the parking lot I immediately checked my makeup, which needed some work (ok - lots of work)! I took a deep breath and walked in the doors. I was greeted with smiles and started my day.

Of course throughout the day, I called every hour to check on her. She was doing great and all the teachers adored her! The calling every hour eventually went down to a few times a day and then finally to once a day. I slowly fell back into being at work and enjoying it. I missed being with her all day but I saw that she was having a great time with the other children and was learning so much from her teachers. I felt good about my decision and felt that it was all for the best.

So the big question is…. Did I have any regrets about my decision?
I guess I am the type of person that does not look back. I made my choice and truly believe that it was made for the right reasons. There are benefits for kids to stay at home AND for kids to go to daycare. I am lucky that I have experienced both situations and have seen the positives in each. At the end of the day, the choice was mine and I made the right choice for our family!

Filed under: Mom-Me?