by Karolyn Hart

I was staying in Las Vegas on business when it happened.  I decided to put on the TV in the bathroom as I got ready in the morning for some upcoming meetings.  I was in the middle of brushing my teeth when a show came on called “My New BFF” that is all about Paris Hilton’s quest to find a new best friend.  My brushing slowed until it eventually came to a full stop. As I stood there with my toothbrush hanging out of my mouth I mumbled out loud “You have got to be kidding me!” 

I was having the same experience that happens to us all when we see a really bad car accident.  You know that you should look away but your curiosity gets the best of you.  So despite what you know is right you keep watching the tragedy.

Now before I continue let me express that I am not a hater of Paris Hilton.   I think she is a PR dream and as far as the promotion of her personal brand - she and her team have done amazing things.  She is the first  celebrity to be famous for being famous rather then it being a by-product of something she did.  Regardless of what you think, that is an accomplishment.

The challenge I see is entirely with her  personal brand altogether.  She has made her success on being the girl with the money and the looks.  She has raised such a following that a group of young girls were willing to be on her show to claim the title as her new “BFF”. Wow. At one point Paris tells a girl they can’t be friends because she can’t party as hard as she can. Double wow.

The fact is that Paris and her team are laughing all the way to the bank.  I’m sure (like any good strategist) they knew exactly what they were doing. Captilazing on her brand, on the fact that girls everywhere would love to be in her presence and for many it would be like a dream come true.  Girls will tune in everywhere to watch ordinary people get to live out what they secretly wish they could do - be Paris HIlton’s best friend. From a business stand point it’s a solid game plan - except there is one major hitch - eventually people will want more.

In these trying times it’s already starting to happen.  The excess of materialism, the shallowness of people’s lives played out on reality TV are all starting to lose their appeal.  The reason is simple - everyone is being forced into simpler lives and everyone is clueing into the fact that material posessions do not equate happiness.

The question you have to ask yourself is where are YOU at on this timeline? Are you still chasing after the thing’s that don’t matter?  Are you still trying to fill your life with possessions, accomplishments, and people that are not meaningful?

If so, then you may be at risk of becoming like Paris Hilton.  For some of you this may be a dream come true. Yet, many of you are starting to want something much much more.

I don’t know Paris, I only know the personal brand she puts into the public eye. That personal brand includes moving from guy to guy at a lightning fast speed, having fall outs with her “BFFs”, and living so recklessly that she has put other people’s lives literally at risk.  (Ask any family who has lost a loved one to drunk driving about what they feel about her DUI and I’m sure you’ll see the problem.)

Be aware that focusing in on the material posessions and shallow items will set you up to lead a life that is not full of meaning.  You may be celebrated or even worshipped yet it will not mean anything. Personally, I watch our young celebrities with a certain measure of sadness.  I wonder if they ever have anyone in their life asking tough questions and challenging them to a deeper level in their life?  I wonder if they can even see the destructive legacy and path they are on.

Unfortunately, it’s not just the celebrities. It’s here in the “ordinary” world of the unfamous.  So many people have bought into the lie of the superficial.  Soccer moms, CEOs, even those who work in the religious field have their priorities in a mess.  They ignore the nagging feeling that may crop up occasionally and make excuses for their life being out of balance.  It’s a struggle for us all. The question I ask myself constantly to keep me in balance is this:

“If I were to die today would I have made a significant postive difference in the lives of others?”

Can you truthfully answer yes?  Would you wish you spent less time on your achievements and more time on your relationships? Would you have spent more time serving others instead of serving yourself?

If you’ve identified yourself as being “at risk” here  are some steps you can do to creating a life of meaning.

Step One - Document Your Days
If you want to see where your real priorities are journal your life for one week.  Take an hour every night and in point form list everything you did that day.  Then in a separate paragraph answer this one question: “What did I think about most today?”

Step Two - Evaluate
After you read your journal you will have a picture of your priorities. Only you can evaluate your life and determine how you want to change it.  Ask your self the following questions:

• What do I like about where I spend my time?
• What do I want to change about where I spend my time?
• What is one thing I can STOP doing right away that will make room for me to START doing something I really want to?

Step Three - Discuss
Select five people in your life that you trust and ask them if they would be willing to help you with a project.  When you meet with them ask them this one question: “What do you think I stand for?” Then listen attentively and don’t argue what they say.  This is your change to really learn about the difference you make in the people around you.  If you disagree with what they are saying then it all it shows you is that you’ve got some work to do with where you want to be.

Step Four - Make a Plan
Write down five things you are going to do to change! Then post the list on your mirrors, carry it with you and read it often.

Step Five - Repeat all the Steps
I guarantee that if you do this you will see a change and don’t forget to celebrate even the smallest changes! You get one life and any moment you can celebrate is a moment you should savour!

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A FINAL THOUGHT: I’d love to see a show where Paris Hilton decides to explore something deeper like travelling to a third world country and making a difference! Now THAT would be a show that would transcend every demographic and be  something that we could all learn from! I eagerly await that day! 

 

Filed under: Life