by Karolyn Hart

I like to think of myself as a person who grabs life by the horns and courageously tackles anything. In my professional life I can say that I’ve consistently (and yes intentionally) thrown myself into areas that allowed me to grow. When I was 21 working at one of my first “real” jobs a colleague (who later became a good friend) said she knew I was “different” because I once told her that “If I’m not over my head, I get bored.”

It explains why over the years I’ve always wanted to consume knowledge. Whether it’s learning a new skill, launching a new project, or taking on a new initiative - I absolutely love to be challenged. In fact, I became so comfortable in this state of challenge that I thought arrogantly to myself one day “I don’t have to deal with comfort zones because I just never allow myself to get in one.”

Ya - I should have KNOWN by thinking that I was asking for trouble.

It all began several weeks ago when we made new friends in our neighbours.  They are this wonderful couple that live up the street and are incredibly active.  They work around the yard together, walk together, and join in community events - like volley ball.   They asked my husband and I to join them for a friendly game with a group of people at the community centre up the street.

Now allow me to pause and say to all my friends and family that KNOW me (and are even now laughing at the idea of me doing anything sports related) that in all fairness to this couple - I have appeared to be mildly athletic.  They see me jogging past their house and hear how I am excited to get on my jet skis. So how would they know?

My hubby, fully aware of my difficulty in this area, sensitively approached me with the request and I accepted with cautious optimism.  After all, NOBODY thought that I would get up on our stand-up jet ski last summer and I not only did but was pretty decent. So I took a deep breath, and agreed.

We were half-way to the community centre when the first warning flag came up.  The last time I had played was Grade 5 and I started to get nervous.  My husband saw my anxiety and playfully asked “Are you excited?”  I laughed and playfully replied, “Yes, in a ‘I hope I don’t humiliate myself’ sort of way.”

Then we arrived and entered the gymnasium.  Now here’s the thing…growing up as a child I was..how shall we say “not entirely popular”. I was lucky because some of the girl’s who were popular decided they liked me. This essentially mean that my “bully rotation” went significantly down starting on the day they accepted me into their little group. To this day I still feel appreciative of Danielle, Michelle, Heather, Holly, Leslie, Tricia, Tammy and Dawn - however I digress.

The POINT is that I was in every sense a classic book worm. For that matter I STILL am!  As I entered the gymnasium something crazy happened. I suddenly was transported back in time and all the old feelings of anxiety surrounding gym class came crashing in on me.

Darn it! It appears I DO have a comfort zone which involves staying as far way from team sports as possible.

I explained to the people around me that I had never really played and tried to joke about my awkwardness. (Note to self: it never worked in grade school it’s not gonna work now!)

I got a few pointers, got split on to the other  team away from my hubby, and spent the next 15 minutes playing dodgeball instead of volleyball.  You see dodgeball is something that “geeks” inherently understand.  Things careening towards us will ultimately “hurt” therefore you “dodge” and avoid pain.

However, something wonderful happened.  As I AM an adult who was playing with other adults they all started helping me out.  I watched as all these grown men and women just threw themselves around and that effort got the biggest applause. If you missed, no one cared - especially if you were throwing yourself into it.

The good thing about being a geek is that we tend to be quick learners. So I psyched myself up and said “Karolyn, you can DO this.” The next time that ball came over the net I was going to be there - and boy was I!

In what can only be described as the slow-motion play of the century I saw the large white mass of the ball lobbing over the net coming directly towards me. I was in the back row centre. I confidently called out “Mine!” and began the attack on not just a volleyball but all my sports related fears! Somewhere between my enthusiasm and throwing my body across the court it hit me.

No really - the ball hit me square on  the top of my head. In fact, it hit me so hard that it drove me to the ground. I found myself with my legs sitting out in front of me and my bottom planted firmly on the floor.  I was dazed and truly confused. Both sides were laughing but my team was screaming - with delight.

The ball managed to find it’s way back over the net off my head and the thing was still in play! We even got the point.  My team mates gave me high-fives and said comments like “Now THAT’s using your head!” when it occured to me.  I had just faced my fears head on (no pun intended) and it wasn’t nearly as awful as I had always imagined.

WIth my dignity now completely gone I became “slightly” more confident.  I managed to hit the ball with my head a second time (amazingly) and even did a play “off the net” which I later learned is generally more tricky - but to me it ALL felt difficult.

Can I brag and tell you that incredibly my team even won!! Only by one point but heck - we still won!

What it made me realize is that we are never done growing.  Even after we learn to do something, eventually we will become comfortable and it will be time to leave that zone.  I already understood the power of teams in the corporate setting but truly began to understand how a sports-game is a microcosm of life.  There are wins, there are failures - and at the end of the day whether you win or lose you can still have FUN.

I also learned that I’m completely ok with not really loving sports.  So am I going to do it again?

Well sure, but this time I’m staying on hubby’s team.  I discovered what I like best is having a fun experience with those I love.  Well, that and apparently I’m a super-powered athlete and I don’t want to stack the odds against my own husband.

Filed under: Author Karolyn, Life